aftermath

I did a horrible job eating intentionally two weeks ago and have week been in the aftermath, recovering.

I was out of town on vacation with family with a lot of work to do, no internet to do it, lots of yummy snacks- the kinds I never buy- AND no shakes because I shared a protein shake on day 3 of my 10 days away sold the entire canister on the spot.

Even though I had an absolute BLAST hanging out with these guys

there were times in which I felt overwhelmed about the amount of work I could have done, stuck as I needed internet to do the majority of it, and overstimulated with exciting new updates that have transpired and now began in the recent weeks: 

New and perfect part-time job.
New house with move-in date.
New blog with new look, name, and URL (coming soon).
New book (also coming somewhat soon, maybe.)

More to come on the new updates. 

Because all of my snacking triggers were hit, I snacked a lot.  Chemical-loaded, sugary, buttery, fried, fatty, unsatisfying snacks.  All day every day for 10 days.

I am just as ashamed as I am amazed that I literally did such a horrible job honoring the healthy habit I set for myself.  Regardless, it happened and now I have to make a choice to move on and try again.

After all of this snacking, there is one thing I noticed.  Chemically processed foods have a horrible aftertaste.  I was way more in tune with my body than I have been in the past, and even though there were times when my mind was out of control, grabbing for endless amounts of chips and salsa, I was still kind of listening for my body's response.  And it wasn't good.

I realized that only the first few bites taste good.  Literally after 3 bites of a chocolate chip cookie the delicious and life-changing taste basically disappears.  Now most of the week this did not stop me from finishing the cookie and potentially even grabbing another, but I did notice that it stopped tasting good.  And within minutes of finishing the cookie, this really weird chemical taste lingered in my mouth for hours.

Just try it.  Eat a cookie or bowl of ice cream of brownie or something with the good stuff (and by good stuff I mean the bad stuff), and then tune into how you feel.  I noticed feeling bloated, uncomfortable, lethargic, with a lingering headache.  As a result I was unmotivated and lacking in energy.  Noting this feeling is motivating to avoid these binging sessions as there is no fruit.  I feel yucky and it even tastes yucky.  I want to make a habit of considering the aftermath as I open my mouth to eat.  

So as I sit in the aftermath of an unhealthy week, reflecting on the aftermath of these choices, I call to mind that apart from God I can do nothing.  (John 15:5)  And so I continue to ask God for help as I press on in the pursuit of health.

Lord please restore my health this year.  I can't do it without you.  I release the control of my body to you.  I recognize that it is not by will nor might that I will see health.  Give me patience as I wait for you to act and help me not to labor in vain.