On a scale from 1 - 10, 1 being I despise my body and am desperate to change and 10 being I value my body and enjoy taking care of it, where would I fall?
The more I thought about this I would rate myself at an 8, which coming from a 1 twelve years ago is miraculous. It is valuable to take time to access metacognition and partake in the exersice of thinking about our thinking. How do you think about your body?
For some with a low rating, this month is a time to intentionally create a habit of appreciating and valuing your body for the gift it is, but for others like me the enemy of our health may not be a poor body image. So that leads me to question why am I not in optimal health? If I value my body and want to care for it, why don't I?
While it was over a decade ago that I was abusing my physical body intentionally, it was only a year and even months ago that I would mistreat my body by neglect. When I started teaching five years ago I lost over fifteen pounds this way; I was not dieting nor trying to lose weight at all, I was simply "too busy" to care for myself and allowed other priorities to slip in front of making healthy choices. I stopped making time to eat, and when it did it was junk that was quick and easy. I also stopped making exercise a priority. I slept less and felt horrible.
Some of these bad habit have snuck themselves back into my life during this past week as it was my first full week back at work. I am starting to recognize the culprit of my unhealthy lifestyle over the past 5 years could be identified as an issue of neglect. It is not that I do not value my body nor want to care for it, but that I stopped making time for health and let important healthy habits slip out of my daily schedule.
Yesterday my school held parent- teacher conferences which meant I left home at 6:30 am and arrived back again at 8:30 pm. It was not until my car ride home that I reflected and realized how little and how poorly I ate during the day as the demands of meeting the needs of 25 students (and their families) stole every waking moment and took precedent over taking care of my body. From not taking time to eat healthy foods to not taking time to use the bathroom to not having one moment to sit and take a deep breath, the minutes and hours snuck by so quickly which left few moments for self-care.
I am so intentional to use my time at work well that I often prioritize work over health which leads me to neglect and mistreat my body. It is even more of a challenge now as I am adjusting to life as a working mom which means arriving at the last possible moment, leaving immediately after school, and carving out time to pump in-between which means every second is even more precious than it was before.
Time is a major enemy of health and more of a struggle for me than having a negative self-image.
But I call to mind the reality that I am in control of my life through the gift of CHOICE. I choose how I spend my time whether it is intentional or not. The reality is that we all make time for things that are really important to us. We do it naturally, without even thinking, and that is what habits are. Habits are those natural reactions to life and those things we do without needing to think about doing them. This year is a time for me to reset some of my natural reactions.
About a month ago I wrote about how I was going to give myself permission to spend money on my health this year and today I recognize the need to also give myself permission to spend time on this pursuit.
I am challenging myself to prioritize caring for my body once again, especially while at work. I am forcing myself to take moments to STOP working throughout the day to eat life giving foods, take a moment of peace to clear my mind, and ask God for help. I am determined to create the healthy habit of valuing my body and as a result caring for it, rooted in my desire to be obedient by viewing my body as a gift and vessel for the Holy Spirit.
No comments:
Post a Comment